Weekend Update

March 27, 2021

I can’t tell how encouraging it is to read through the numerous comments that have been shared and know we are being shored up by so much support and love from all over the place. Thank you!

I just wanted to update you with a couple of things . . .

First of all, we have had some follow-up calls from Duke just getting some details organized but we haven’t yet gotten any specific appointments set.  It makes me slightly crazy going into the weekend without knowing what the next week holds, but I guess slightly crazy is better than all crazy.

Duke did tell Sarah they wanted her to do a 24-hour urine collection which tests for neuroblastoma. Neither our family doctor or the radiologist seem to think it would be relapsed NB  this far out, but they need to qualify it one way or another.

Sarah and Gage left for Fayetteville last night and will stay with his family until Sunday night. It makes me happy to think of the two of them surrounded by all that love from his home church as well as from his parents and five brothers.  I know they will receive a lot of strength and joy from those moments together.

Speaking of home churches, I caught this photo of Crystal, a dear woman in our church, praying for Sarah in the lobby last Sunday. It touched my mama heart.

Road Trip

Sarah and I had such a lovely road trip together on Thursday. For just a few hours, it was like the stress and anxiety dissipated and we were just a regular ol’ mama and daughter having a fun day together.  We talked about medical stuff for maybe a total of twenty minutes and she fielded a couple of calls from Duke but other than that, it was wedding talk and girl talk. The weather was perfect and it was an absolutely golden day filled with moments we will look back on many times in the weeks to come.

Wedding

In all this talk of medical stuff, I never want to overlook writing about a certain wedding!

I wrote earlier that Meagan and her sister, Kristin, had flown in two weeks ago but I didn’t say why they had come because Gage hadn’t proposed yet.

The short version of the story is that once they knew that there was a proposal in the offing, Meagan called to ask if it would be okay for her and Kristin to fly to NC and help us plan and shop for decorations. Sarah and I said a huge, hasty, and heartfelt “Yes!”

Sarah and I left the house at 7:30 one morning to drive the three hours to pick up the Florida gals at the Raleigh airport.  After two long visits to Hobby Lobby, one long trip to David’s Bridal, and a couple of meals, we arrived back in Manteo sixteen hours later–exhausted and exhilarated.

We even brought Gage into the planning by video chatting a couple of times.

It was so fun for Sarah to have a sister and a sister-for-the-day to shop with, and to celebrate this joyful season with. Looking back at that day from our current vantage point, those carefree, innocent moments are all the more precious.  She was just a happy bride-to-be with nary a worry in her head except what color a certain ribbon should be.

We are forever grateful to Meagan and Kristin for taking the time to invest in Sarah and her beautiful future.  And to make it even better, Kristin is going to come back for the wedding with Nathan and Meagan and their family. She will be in charge of organizing and decorating, and will also direct the wedding.   She is incredibly gifted in these areas and I am incredibly ungifted in those areas, so I am a hundred times grateful for her generous investment of heart, time, and talent into my girl’s big day, especially in light of the other challenges we are facing.

Our house looked just slightly overrun the day after we got home, but at least we got a bunch of stuff done ahead of time, which was a wonderful feeling.

And one more thing about that day?

Sarah (accidentally) found her dress!  She had originally said she wanted to dress shop with just me because she doesn’t really like a lot of hullabaloo or being the center of attention.  We went to David’s to just look at bridesmaid dresses and while Meagan was wandering around the bride’s dresses, a couple of them happened to catch their eye.

We asked Sarah if she wanted to try them since we were right there and she said she would. The second one she put on? It was it!

And what a joy and treasure it was that, in the end, she DID have a couple of people to flutter around her and make a to-do.  Meagan and Kristin are genuinely enthusiastic, affirming women and they made Sarah feel like a million dollars. And they also thought of a bunch of wedding details/accessories that would NEVER have crossed my mind.

When I saw that the dress did not have a price tag, I asked the attendant to go check on it.  I was gearing myself up for some awful, awful price when she returned and showed us some words on her tablet screen.

On sale. $299!

Sarah’s and my bargain-shopping hearts were full.

To be honest, I struggled a bit with finding the dress so quickly.  I had pictured many mother/daughter days, checking out lots of places and lots of dresses.  But when I look at the big picture I can see what a blessing it is that we don’t have to try to fit in dress shopping with everything else that is coming.  God’s  provision and timing are perfect.

Well, I set out to write a short update and look at all these words.  I think I am finding it therapeutic to write while I wait, so write I shall.

A couple of things before I close . . .

Sheri’s Blog

For those of you have been reading Sheri Hawley’s blog (Sheri is Meagan’s mom), you probably know it has been having some technical glitches for the last month or so.  You’ll be glad to know that, as of this week, it’s back up and running. If you haven’t yet visited Sheri’s blog, today would be a great time.  She is funny, articulate, and wise, plus, she is one of my dearest friends, as well as the other grandma of my grandkids.

Donation Link

Jenna, one of my sweet, long-time readers, had suggested that I consider putting a donation link on the blog to help with all of the upcoming expenses. If you’ve ever been to a hospital, you know you can spend more money in half a day than most people spend in a year.

So I’m not going to say a lot about the button except to let you know you can find it on the sidebar.

Outing

Last night, Steve and I decided that it would be therapeutic for us to get into his Miata, put the top down, and zoom over this bridge

Sometimes when life closes in, I have to go out and surround myself with the glories of birds and sky and sea.  They don’t make my troubles go away but they do remind me of who created all that glory and then, by extension, who created that sweet daughter of mine. His fingerprints are all over nature, all over Sarah’s life, and all over her future.

I’m thankful for the glories of this earth that point to the Creator–big enough to make it all and yet personal enough to wipe this mama’s tears.

 

“The cure for anything is salt water—tears, sweat, or the sea. ” —Isak Dinesen

 

 

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58 comments so far.

58 responses to “Weekend Update”

  1. Michele says:

    I am so glad you and Sarah were able you spend an enjoyable day together! It is great that Megan and Kristen came snd helped Sarah get her wedding planning off to a great start. Love the pictures. Prayers to all

  2. LeeAnne says:

    Becky, I’m so glad to see that you and Sarah were able to go have a mom/daughter day. How special! The picture of you two is really beautiful! I can hardly wait to see Sarah in her wedding dress. She will undoubtedly steal the show whether she wants the attention or not.

    Thank you for taking the time to update on the medical front. I would be a nervous wreck if there were no appointments made yet. I am a planner and organizer to the core and the unknown would be so difficult. A seaside drive with your honey and the wind in your hair sounds like the perfect distraction.

    Even though I love details and truly loved planning my daughter’s wedding, I do believe that planning a wedding in two months might be my undoing. Having Meagan and Kristin helping you is such a blessing! When my daughter got married, we went to look at a dress that she had previously seen and she wanted to try on. I told her that I would buy that one but wanted her to try something else on so that she would know for sure that it was ‘the one’. As it turned out, I found one that was completely different from her pick, she tried it on and instantly cried and said it was HER dress. Even better? It was on clearance for $100 marked down from $1700!! (I had not even looked at the price tag before she tried it on) That was such a pleasant surprise and we both declared it the bargain of the century.

    Hoping your week is good and that appointments get made. Continuing to keep you ALL in my prayers.

    • Becky says:

      Lee Anne,

      Wow. That truly was the bargain of the century. And even better that she loved it so much she cried. A perfect combination.

  3. Heather L Eland says:

    I’m so glad you and Sarah were able to get away for some Mom and daughter time. The picture of the two of you is beautiful.

    I too bought my wedding dress on sale, and in a similar way to Sarah- I went to a local dress shop with my Mom- just to look and see what styles I liked- and I found one I loved on clearance. I asked if it could be held until the next day so my Daddy could see it, and when he saw me in it it said it was a “Heather” dress. I was so glad to get it at a great price.

    Praying for you all during this time.

    Heather

    • Becky says:

      Heather,

      I love your dad saying it was a Heather dress. And to get the perfect Heather dress at a great price? Fabulous!

  4. A lovely update! I’m so eager to see her dress, and I know she’s going to be a stunning bride. 🙂 I also love that her tribe came together to get the planning underway for the BIG DAY!

    I’ve read through the comments, and am everso grateful to know Dr. Driscoll is ON IT.

    • Becky says:

      Stefanie,

      At times like this, one definitely needs a tribe.

      Yes, Dr. Driscoll is definitely on it and I couldn’t be more thankful or reassured that he is.

  5. Nicole Doyal says:

    What a busy and productive weekend you had! So glad so many pieces/details are working out for the wedding so quickly. And I just have to say that getting engaged in February after just starting to date in Dec is not bad at all…my husband and I were engaged 6 weeks after our first date and married 1 year and 6 days after our first date…and in April, we will celebrate 33 years! (Can’t believe it has been that long!).
    And I totally get the whole needing to go see the water thing to rest/relax. My daughter and I have started what we call our Sunday Water Drive. Just a quick drive to go see some water nearby. It is calming!

    • Becky says:

      Nicole,

      Six weeks. Wow! I guess when you know a good thing, there’s no reason to wait. And congratulations on thirty-three years.

      I agree. Water is so calming. So thankful to live 15 minutes from the Atlantic. But like you said, you can do near any body of water and still get those great relaxing effects.

  6. Joy says:

    So happy you and Sarah were able to spend some Mother – Daughter time together. How special.

    I know you all had so much fun picking out wedding decor. How exciting to come upon the perfect dress. It always seems to happen when you are not really looking for one. I know it will be absolutely beautiful on Sarah. Can’t wait to see all the wedding pictures.

    I am praying that Sarah is able to get in to see the doctor soon and to receive great news. We know God has this and he has such special plans for Sarah and Gage’s future.

    Love and hugs.

    • Becky says:

      Joy,

      Yes, Sarah will definitely be a beautiful bride. Thankful that the wedding dress shopping is done so we have one less thing to think about over the coming weeks.

  7. krista121799 says:

    I’m so glad that everything seems to be falling in to place for Sarah and Gage’s wedding. THat is a fun time for sure and I’m happy she was able to do it with you all!
    Continuing to pray…

    • Becky says:

      Krista,

      I’m grateful that all those details that are falling into place are not all on MY plate! Such a blessing to have wonderful help.

  8. Katrina says:

    I really like the picture of you and Sarah !

    Does Dr. Discroll knows about Sarah’s CT scan?

    Thinking of you all

    • Becky says:

      Katrina,

      Yes, we did email to tell him what we had found out and he immediately asked for the scan. Even though he won’t be able to be Sarah’s doctor because he only does pediatrics, it’s still comforting to us to know that he is at least in the loop and can help to direct us to the best adult doctors for Sarah.

  9. Dale Tousley says:

    Becky and Steve and Sarah, I thought you might enjoy this Easter week story about my son……I was raised in the Methodist Church but kind of fell away after confirmation but when I had kids I wanted to bring them back to the church so when we settled in Kansas City, I chose our local Methodist Church, so my kids started in the fall, they were in K and 4th grade and as I was bringing them into their Sunday school classes on Easter Sunday in 1998 my son (who had just turned 6) stopped and said wait….what is God’s kid’s name again and I said uh Jesus and he said yes…and his last name is ? and I said Christ… and he said yes…that is it…he said my teacher was talking a lot about him last week (Palm Sunday) and I know she is going to ask a lot of questions…so when I picked him up I said how did it go and he said did you know that Jesus died on a Friday and then woke up and went to Heaven on Sunday and I said yes, I did know that… and he said what day of the week did Poppop die and I said Wednesday and he said oh do you think he still made it to Heaven….and I said yes, I am 100 percent sure he made it there….such a sweet story of innocence…

    • Becky says:

      Dale,

      I love how the mind of a child works. Precious, indeed. And also loved that he asked for Jesus’ last name! Too funny. 🙂

  10. Bridgette says:

    You two are absolutely amazing. Beauty in the midst of fear. I can only hope if I’m ever faced with with trials like you are facing, I can follow your example. Continued prayers.

    • Becky says:

      Bridgette,

      Thanks so much for your encouragement. I am certainly grateful for God’s grace and peace in the middle of everything.

  11. Guerrina says:

    I love someone’s comment that Jesus’ fingerprints are all over Sarah. So very true! Love & prayers from CT!

  12. Dear Becky, Since we have the privilege of knowing you, Pastor Steve and Sweet Sarah personally, I readily admit that your latest news hit me very hard. As my mind reeled with “the roller coaster in the dark”, I wondered – what words of comfort could I possibly give to a ministering family that you don’t already know? There aren’t any. But this is the verse that first came into my mind, and I ask you to hold it in your heart as I will do. “Now faith is the SUBSTANCE of things hoped for, the EVIDENCE of things not seen.” (Heb 11:1). I hope this verse will bring comfort to you in the days to come, as it has for me during the past two years. Please know that your family will be in our prayers every single day. (BTW, the recent photo of Sarah and Gage in his red polka-dot bow tie just might be the best photo you have ever taken!) Love, Fred & Lucy

    • Becky says:

      Fred and Lucy,

      Thank you for your kind words. And yes, that truly is a wonderful verse–so much truth there.

      I’m glad you liked that photo and I wish I could take credit. But Gage’s brother, Nick, took it. Isn’t he great?

  13. Phyllis says:

    So glad that you and Sarah were able to get away for the day. A little road trip can do a world of good.
    Hope Sarah hears on appointments at Duke soon and you at least have some info. Waiting is the hardest thing.
    That was a bargain on the dress. I’m sure having Meagan and Kristin along to help pick out decorations, weigh in on the dress, etc. was a big help. I am not great at that sort of things either.
    Continuing to pray for Sarah and all of you.

    • Becky says:

      Phyllis,

      Yes, I feel very, very blessed to have Meagan and Kristin on board. I’d never make it without their wonerful help!

  14. Sharyn McDonald says:

    This post brought tears to my eyes. Remembering back when you were wondering if Sarah would graduate from high school, then wondering about college, and, of course, would she find the man of her dreams and be married. How wonderful that you were able to set aside for a while her recent diagnosis and enjoy the day shopping for Sarah’s wedding. Ah, the place to go, Hobby Lobby and to hear Christian music as you shop. We all continue to think of each of you with love and prayers.

    • Becky says:

      Sharyn,

      Yes, I remember all those “wonderings” through the years. And here we are, now. In this new season. Wondering what’s ahead.

  15. Meredith says:

    That quotation from Dinesen is one of my favorites of all time. I still remember reading it for the first time and being stopped in my tracks.

    I have been thinking of Sarah so often since your two most recent posts. I cannot imagine the swell of juxtaposed emotions you all must be feeling right now.

    I hope that Sarah receives good news, or at least the solace that comes from knowing that there is a solid plan in place. I hope that your mama heart is soothed by the same. And I hope that all of the Smiths and Smith-adjacents will find a bit of healing in salt, whichever form it may take.

    Sending lots of love and strength to you all from here in North Dakota.

    • Becky says:

      Meredith,

      That truly is a fabulous quote with SO much truth in it.

      I liked the newly coined phrase, “Smith-adjacents.” We’ll have to use that!

      Thank you for your encouraging words.

  16. Laura Nettles says:

    So thankful for this cheery update! You know your followers are checking in more frequently than the usual once a week on Mondays. Thank you for thinking of us and writing another update. Your words are soothing.

    • Becky says:

      Laura,

      I knew I wanted to share the photo of Sarah and me because it cheered me up to look at it and I thought it would cheer up the wonderful readers who have taken this situation so close to heart.

      And yes, as time allows, I will definitely be posting more than once a week.

  17. Cheryl Denton says:

    Ok. You have me crying again. The tears include, “Jesus, You’ve-got-this-tears.” Your expression of Jesus” fingerprints all over Sarah (as well as nature) touched me deep. For you. For me. For all your readers. In the.middle of my emotional struggles, your raw exposure of crisis mingled with faith is an inspiration. Thank you. 🙏

    • Becky says:

      Cheryl,

      We have all walked down those emotionally raw roads, haven’t we? And that’s why we can relate to each others’ struggles so well, because we have felt the same emotions.

      Praying for you and your sweet family.

  18. Marina says:

    Long time reader and first time commenter here. Praying for Sarah and your family and sending you love and light from NY.

  19. Jill says:

    My wedding dress, almost 36 years ago, was one I tried on early on the first day. It was on clearance! We went and tried another store afterward, but went running back for the first dress! My cousin later wore it too.

    Hearing about your girl time together and the wedding planning fills my heart with joy! Along with the medical issues, I pray for a wonderful season of wedding and marriage. Can’t wait to see the beautiful bride and her groom!!

    • Becky says:

      Jill,

      I love that your cousin wore your same wedding dress. So special!

      Yes, it is wonderful to have something joyful like a wedding to plan in the midst of this uncertain season.

  20. dmantik says:

    Such a good post. So happy you two could have a stress-free day away.

    And how great are Meagan and Kristen?! Thankful that they are so generously using their incredible talents to help lift the load from your and Sarah’s shoulders.

    Sending much love and support. ❤️

    Deb

    • Becky says:

      Deb,

      Yes, I would be in a heap on the floor if it weren’t for the fact that I know I have The Sisters on my team, thinking through all of the 500 hundred details I would never have even known to consider. SOOOOO thankful!

  21. Mrs. Pam says:

    how wonderful that Sarah found the her perfect wedding dress. Summer seems in awe of all the bags. Sarah is on my church’s prayer list.

    • Becky says:

      Mrs. Pam,

      Yes, Summer was not quite sure what to make of all the people and the stuff. I’m surprised she didn’t run for the hills.

      Thanks for putting Sarah on your church’s list.

  22. Susie says:

    Like many others, a very long time follower and hardly ever commenter (maybe once on your closet organization post :)) Sending you many prayers and much love from Colorado. The same dress shopping experience happened to my daughter and me. First shop, second dress and it was a “sample” making the price just what we needed! While I was so happy for her, I also felt like the experience was cut short. It wasn’t! That just gave us more time to make more wedding planning memories. I hope you have so much fun with the entire process. Nothing better than celebrating love!

    So happy for Sarah and Gage. God’s plan is clearly at work with your love. Congratulations! Praying for your healing and comfort during treatments.

    Becky-we may never have the pleasure of meeting in person. It is my goal this year to express gratitude to those around me. You and your family have literally helped restore my faith. You exude so much love and kindness to those around you. Your Christianity shines through all you do. It is nice to see that in this World. Thank you so much.

    • Becky says:

      Susie,

      Thank you for taking the time to comment and for sharing your daughter’s and your wedding dress story. I love how you reframed the experience in saying it gave you more time to make wedding planning memories.

      Your closing words were beyond touching. I’m so glad to know that something in the words I’ve written over the years has had an impact on your life. Thanks so much for sharing that; it means a lot.

  23. Cindy says:

    Becky, I loved all the shopping and shopping bag pictures, and I am glad it’s one less thing for all of you to be concerned about now. I am also thankful for the donation button, what a great idea. Praying for Sarah and all of you.

    • Becky says:

      Cindy,

      Yes, I am thankful, indeed, that we got that much shopping out of the way. We tried to maximize every moment while having all four of us in the same town at the same time.

      I am grateful for the generous folks (like yourself) who have already made use of that button. Thank you, friend!

  24. DeLynn says:

    Thank you for this update! I know so many of us (friends whom have never met!) have you so much on our minds and in our prayers.
    I love the story of how God prompted Meagan and Kristin to come when they did—you all got so much done and had fun doing it! What a sweet blessing from your Heavenly Father who loves you all so.
    I continue to pray for Sarah and all of you who love her!

  25. Linnae Stole says:

    Becky, like others I am a frequent reader and rare commenter. Just wanted to add to the chorus of readers who are praying for Sarah and Gage on their upcoming nuptials, for Sarah’s health, and for the uncertainty your whole family is facing right now. May God’s peace be with you all in the days ahead.

    • Becky says:

      Linnae,

      I like the imagery of a “chorus of readers.” Combines two of my favorite things: reading and music.

      Thanks for being a part of the chorus.

  26. Ellen W says:

    I’m excited to see the wedding that Sarah, Gage and their talented advisors put together. Sarah and Gage both have such a lovely sense of style; classic with a unique twist. I’m sure it’s going to shine through on their big day.

    • Becky says:

      Ellen,

      A unique twist is right! The two of them are a perfect pair in that area; both a little quirky and love being that way.

  27. Angie says:

    Thank you so much for the update. My prayers, thoughts, and heart are with you all. Sending many hugs and much love across the miles. l

  28. Lesley says:

    Good morning! Love to see your smiling faces in the post opening. What a whirlwind it has been for you all. Glad Sarah is having a celebratory weekend with Gage’s Family because, yes, there is a wedding to plan. Woohoo! Also, it gives you and Steve a chance to regroup and get your feet a bit back under you with all the uncertainty, if possible. Nature and the sea certainly helps us to be reminded of the big picture. I’ve been thinking of you every day and trying to process it all myself, even though I’ve never met you all. It certainly feels very personal after all these years. It’s lucky for us that writing happens to be therapeutic for you because we love to listen.
    I forgot that this time you are the parents of the bride! It’s much different than being the parents of the groom. LOL. So much to pull together. Yay for Kristin!

    • Becky says:

      Lesley,

      Whirlwind is definitely a good word for the events of the past week. Steve has also referred to this experience as “a rollercoaster in the dark.”

      It means so much that friends I haven’t met have been thinking so often of Sarah and our family over these past few days. Thank you!

  29. rdmantik says:

    Nicely said. Even in this we are overcomers in His name. Thanks for the honest, hope filled post.

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